Confession. I bought T-Rex’s birthday cake. Hmm…I thought confessing would make me feel better. Nope. I did at least have a coupon. And Publix makes really good cake. And the smash cake was free. Still don’t feel better. It sure did taste good though. And it was cute. Sigh. I give up.
On October 5, while driving to the grocery store by myself, I started my fall freak-out session. In that rare moment of solitary silence when I could actually think, I realized sometimes it’s better not to think. It was in that moment while approaching the train tracks that I realized I had just hit the craziest part of my year. In addition to the normal Halloween costuming, Thanksgiving cooking, and Christmas giving of the next three months I also had 2 weeks of family guests, T-Rex’s first birthday, a two week trip to the Great North (which for us also means locating a full winter wardrobe for 2 weeks), two nieces first birthdays, my Dad’s birthday, a brother-in-law’s birthday, and days after we return home from the Great North, Little Miss Sunshine’s third birthday. I crossed the tracks (my thoughts happened that quickly – there was no train!) and started telling myself “breathe, just breathe, breathe, go to the grocery store, breathe.” My mind hasn’t stopped racing since then.
I make lists. Halfway through the list, I start a new list. Then I make lists of my lists. Then I crumple them up and start it all over the next day. Yesterday, I gave up on lists and just figured that if I didn’t do something, the only person who wouldn’t know was me, well and anyone who walks into our home and sees the BLACK grout that is gray in non-traffic areas and the spots on the carpet and the million projects strewn across my crafting desk.
In my dream world I’d love to have thoughtful, handmade gifts for everyone, a home made cake for all my kids birthdays, and a slew of happy warm memories. Happy warm memories survived the crumpling of the lists. Over the past month I’ve been telling myself to not just move through the motions of these crazy months but to soak them in and enjoy them. If that means shopping deals instead of sewing (which it absolutely does) then so be it. I tried so hard to gear up all year for this season, but with a newborn and a toddler, (now two toddlers) it just didn’t happen. And so I just keep doing the next thing. Costuming finished, fabulous and happy warm memories of the time. T-Rex’s birthday finished and an absolutely GORGEOUS day at the park filled with friends and a yummy (gulp) Publix cake. A fabulous week visit with the in-laws and a million warm happy memories. I just keep doing the next thing (and at times the next three things). I’m really not willing to sacrifice those matching pajamas that I have cut out for the kids and their cousins for Christmas, so that is my next thing. One at a time. NEXT!!!
Sounds hectic and crazy! I’ll pray for sanity for you! 🙂 You know, I don’t think buying a cake for a birthday is anything bad, and honestly, I don’t think the children will even care. They just like that the cake is there! 🙂 Sometimes in the insanity, small things like these don’t matter. It matters that your kids are growing up into God-fearing man and woman after the Lord’s own heart. 🙂 Breathe! I’ll keep praying for ya!! 😀
Oh dear Storygirl…I completely understand. I still have those same panicked thoughts. However you are on the right track. Ditto to what Transitional girl said. I know it’s hard to keep ‘the main thing the main thing’ when there are so many cool things out there to enhance and beautify everything around us. So when panic rears its ugly head,continue to take your deep breath and in the deep breath continue to ask the Lord for direction. Just be encouraged that the rest of us are always amazed by how much you do and how well you do everything.
Blessings!
I just bought a pattern to make matching jammies for Christmas – then the next day had my baby girl! I wonder if I could still get them done. As is so often the case, you inspire me to sew more! For now though I think the main thing is continuing to adjust to a toddler & newborn, TRYING to get some rest, and keeping everything some semblance of clean. We’ll see if the jammies get done though.